I’ve been busy today…running errands, taking care of kids, cleaning the house. This afternoon as I was driving around it hit me that I couldn’t remember feeling the baby kick.
I started concentrating on my stomach, willing him to kick.
Nothing.
All sorts of doubts and fears instantly rushed into my mind. Every story I’d heard, show I’d watched, friend I had who’d experienced a loss assaulted my senses. I wanted so desperately to be home so I could lay down and be reassured that life was still there.
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There are times that I unintentionally cause this same sort of panic in the relationships that are closest to me.
I’m awful at staying in touch with people. I have close friends, friends I truly value, that I haven’t talked to in months. Relationships that were full of life that I’ve allowed to lie dormant. By neglecting to show these friends through a word, note or gesture that I care for them, am I causing them to wonder if something is wrong?
When I got home, I laid on my bed, and within a minute I felt the flutters and movements that relieved my unfounded fears.
All it took was a moment of pause. In that moment of connection I knew once again that all was right.
It didn’t take much to reassure me, and the same applies to those I love. A call, an email, even a text…to say, “I miss you. I care about you. I’m thinking of you.”
Just as I’d allowed the busyness of life to distract me from the movements of my unborn son, I let those same excuses keep me from checking in with the people I turn to in times of joy and sorrow.
Now, I’ve got to go make some calls and write some letters…
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My daughter-in-law did the same thing while she was pregnant. Eventually the flutters and movements became what felt like a soccer match. The soccer player was born early this past Thursday morning.
Congratulations, Glynn! Babies are such a blessing. I have had moments with all four of my pregnancies where I worry and allow these doubts to creep in. I guess it’s that Mommy worrying gene kicking in early. 🙂
I love this post…such a perfect illustration!
Thanks! I appreciate the feedback. 🙂
I love how you’ve tied this in–some panic from wondering why you haven’t felt the baby kick to the panic you can feel from relationship-silence. In either case, as you discovered, a pause to listen can help so much. In our busy, fast-paced world, we can easily tune out and miss out on some of the most important sounds, sensations, connections and relationships. I hope you have some rich and rewarding interactions today, with baby and whomever you chat with by phone or by text.
I find that not only do I miss those opportunities with friends far away, but also with my husband and other children. It’s so easy to let things distract us from what’s truly important, huh? Thanks for the comment!
Beautiful, Melissa, and such a good reminder for all of us! Thank you! (:
Thanks Holley!
This is so true. And somehow comforting to know that others can feel the same way about relationships that have been somewhat neglected! It’s not that i want to neglect them, it’s just that life gets moving SO FAST! And then when it slows down for a second, I’M TIRED! Sometimes i even start to get mad that life is going too fast and i get stressed or unhappy. Then, i realize. WAIT! I can DO something about the speed of my life. I can take some stuff out, put the vacumming off, and actually play that game of go fish with my kids. Well, thanks for the blog….. it’s a wonderful reminder to stop and smell the roses.
Sarah –
I totally know what you mean! It’s like we forget we’re in charge of what happens. I so easily let the “to-do”s rule my day, instead of sitting down and figuring out what is the most important thing to get done. Especially with this pregnancy I’m learning that sometimes (ok, all the time) my house is going to be messy, dinner might not be gourmet and my laundry pile will rival Mt. Rainer. But…I can spend time with the kids, cuddle with Josh and talk to friends & family in spite of all that. 🙂
With this fast paced world it is so easy to let life pass us by- before we know it many month’s have gone by without making those connections… I have to remind myself constantly to do the “little things” to keep those friendships alive. Sometimes it will be a text, facebook comment, or a cute hand-written stationary note… when we really look at it, it doesn’t take that much time. This is why I love social networking systems because it has allowed me to be an encouragement to my friends without having to spend hours on the phone chatting… a quick note of love & friendship will brighten anyone’s day!
Congratulations on your new baby by the way! How far along are you? Anyhow, I am from the Lady Blogger’s society (doing the Tea party thing)… 🙂 I look forward to more blog entries! I really like your blog! God bless you!
thank you for stopping by the other day! i’ve had your site open for the last few days and am just checking it out now … perfect timing apparently! love this post and reminder to stay connected to those that matter most to us!
Thanks for leaving a comment! It’s always nice to know when people stop by. 🙂
Great reminders, Melissa. Thanks for comments on my site too. Since you didn’t sign in on my site, I had to track you down on Twitter, but glad I did. 🙂
Blessings…
I loved this post and this is just what I needed today. In addition to people I love, sometimes I forget that there is a greater one who’s in control of my life and try so hard to control everything and to be perfect, which is just impossible. Your post made me stop and ponder….Be still and know that I’m God…Thank you, Melissa. I’m glad I found your blog today.