I’m a {oxy}moron

My children have never had a drop of formula. Never once has their meal come from a bottle. Until around 4-5 months, I am their sole source of nourishment. Slowly infant cereal and pureed baby food are added to their diet, but the nursing continues to at least one year…

At which time they are ready for lunches of microwaved chicken nuggets, corn dogs, mac-n-cheese and goldfish crackers. Nutritious, and delicious!

::

I prefer to carry my baby in a wrap, as opposed to leaving them in an infant car seat or stroller. The personal connection comforts them, creating a close bond and sense of security…

Until they grow too big to carry and I strap a baby leash harness on them to keep them from running off in the airport or out into the street while on a walk. The stuffed animal attached makes it more humane.

::

Several years ago I quit my job to stay home full-time with our children. Josh and I felt that my ability to be present and undivided in my attention to them during their formative years was priority…

Except for when it comes to my activities online through blogging, Facebook or Twitter. Those are ok, because I deserve a break and I’m still in the room with them, right? Right? Oh, and watching TV while they’re napping shouldn’t be a big deal, either.

::

We’re too hard on ourselves. We’re too hard on each other. We’re all just trying to do the best for our kids and ourselves.

My name is Melissa, and my parenting style is oxymoronic…

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23 thoughts on “I’m a {oxy}moron

  1. I love this! What it says to me is: we’re all human and parenting the way that makes sense (or doesn’t) to us! I am a stickler about my kiddos not having junk food, except when they’re sick. In general, sugar is avoided, but chinese food is not. I HAVE to get their hands and face clean after each meal, but only bathe them a couple times a week (except when London requests a bath). The list goes on…

    We have a book called Oxymornica. It’s pretty funny. Quotes and such. :-) This post made me think of that.
    Some quotes:
    “The value of marriage is not that adults produce children, but that children produce adults.” -Peter De Vries.
    “My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think sher enjoyed it.” -Mark Twain.
    “Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.” -P.J. O’Rourke
    “Babies are always more trouble than you thought–and more wonderful.” -Charles Osgood
    “Housework, if it’s done right, can kill you.” -John Skow.
    Oxymoronica!

    :-)

    • “Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.” -P.J. O’Rourke

      I love that quote, Haley! :) Haha! It’s so funny how we can be sticklers for some things, and totally lax on others. I keep thinking about how in fiction writing they say that a villain isn’t all bad, and a hero isn’t all good. Everyone has different shades to their character and actions. There are very few things that are actually harmful to our children, and most parents who are debating about parenting styles aren’t going to be doing those things (neglect, abuse, etc).

      And…now I really want some Indochine with you. Haha!

  2. What if my parenting style is just plain moronic??? ;) The funniest thing to me is the things you say before you have kids, things like,

    “I will never let my child watch more than 30 minutes of television.”
    “I will never let my child eat McDonald’s food more than once in a month.”
    “My child will never sleep in my bed.”
    “My dog will never lick my child’s face.”

    I’ve had to eat my words on all of those. And more. Thanks for being real, Melissa. :)

    • I just thought of a question that’s been weighing on my mind…wondering if you would care to shed some light.

      What do you do when someone else’s idea of what’s best for their child is hurtful to your idea for what’s best for your child? Case in point: someone who doesn’t want my kids around their kids because my kids have the sniffles. What do I do about that? I have multiple children-someone is bound to be sick the majority of the time. I know they’re just trying to do their best. But, it makes me feel like my kids are lepers. Not to mention the strain on my relationship with these other people because they always bring it up as an excuse to not get together. Yet, when their kids are sick, they are more than willing to let them be around my unsick kids. :( Thoughts?

      • Having kids can be both a unifier and a divider is relationships with friends. It’s a tough thing to navigate! My gut reaction is to always go with honesty. Ask you friend about it, she might not even realizing that she’s placed a double standard on your relationship. Or, look up studies on building up immune systems through frequent illness (kidding). Or, give her a face mask for her child to wear (kidding, again). Haha! Anyone else have any suggestions?

    • We all had those words to eat once we had our own. I love that quote that Haley posted up there, it’s so true! How about letting your kids watch TV in your bed while eating chicken nuggets that the dog licked? :) Heehee!

  3. your children’s menu sounds a lot like mine…with Zachary, I have created a ‘chicken nugget monster’..it’s ALL he will eat! But hey..at least I buy the organic/minimally processed (whatever that means) kind! haha!

  4. Oh no! You have one of those leashes? LOL. Hey, to each its own. :)

    I’m the biggest oximoronic dad. But I love it and it’s a ride and it’s fun! We only get to do this parenting while they are still young. When they get older, we’ll miss it. :/

    • Yeah! I was discovering more inconsistencies in my parenting the other night while talking with my mom. Haha! It’s so funny what we can make important and let slide. :)

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