I was given a free house cleaning by a friend as a shower present. I have yet to use it.
Silas is almost 4 months old.
Why haven’t I taken advantage of this fantastic gift of someone coming to scrub my toilets and dust my bookshelves?
I feel like I have to clean the house before she comes. And I haven’t had the time or energy to get it clean enough yet.
I was thinking about this the other day and laughing at myself. I haven’t fully accepted a free gift because of my shame over the state of my house.
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith — and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God — not by works, so that no one can boast. Ephesians 2:8-9
As I was thinking about the housecleaner, God made it personal.
What are you waiting for? Is my grace not enough; the free gift I’ve bestowed on you? Why are you trying to save yourself?
It took my breath away.
Why do we feel we have to have our lives perfectly in order before we can step forward into the future God has for us?
He can use us in our here and now.
Because that struggle you have; others are dealing with it too.
That sorrow on your heart; it has a familiar ache in the heart of another.
That insecurity; that’s in all of us.
A couple of nights ago I came home and Josh was playing guitar. He was reworking a hymn by Joseph Hart, called “Come Ye Sinners.” The words have always impacted me when we’ve sung it at church. With what God has been speaking to me, they are even more so.
I wanted Josh to record his version so I could play it here, but between our four children, his full-time job and life, it didn’t happen. Sometime I’d like to put his music on here, because I’m proud of him and the gift God has given him.
The part that hit me the hardest was this verse:
Come, ye weary, heavy-laden,
Bruised and ruined by the Fall;
If you tarry till you’re better,
You will never come at all: (emphasis mine)
The thought of never realizing the plans God has for me, because of my own tarrying.
That scares me.
God has a plan and a purpose for each of us. He knows when we’re ready. He will never give us more than we can handle
Step out in that calling. Take that job. Sign up for that ministry. Go to that school. Talk to that person. Use that gift.
Don’t tarry until you’re better. Allow the power of the Holy Spirit to work through you and fill in where you feel weak and incapable.
The chorus of the song provides a guide for what we need to do:
I will arise and go to Jesus;
He will embrace me in his arms;
In the arms of my dear Savior,
O there are ten thousand charms (emphasis mine)
What areas have you been holding back in?
Is there any way I can pray for you?
Here’s the recording of Josh singing Come Ye Sinners! Enjoy!!